The Bisexual Perspective on ... "Glee"

At the risk of adding yet more Glee coverage to this site, I next want to talk about the Fox dramedy and the two different portrayals of my fellow bisexuals we have seen on the show over the past two months.

Up first is the episode “Blame it on the Alcohol” which featured Blaine (Darren Criss) kissing Rachel (Lea Michelle) and then briefly wondering if he was bisexual. Let me first say, I was at least happy that the conversation was about his possibly being bi, and not that he might actually be straight. Too often in the past, characters questioning their sexuality have jumped right from one side of the Kinsey scale to the other as if the middle part didn't even exist.

However, that was the only thing Glee did right.

In Blaine's defense, many AfterElton readers have said that they, too, questioned their sexuality at his age. That’s completely fair. Being a teenager is a confusing time, and when you are equipped with a non-standard orientation, it gets even more confusing. I won’t argue that point.

The problem I had wasn't Blaine's doubts. It was how the episode handled them. The show seemed to indicate that although he had never before found girls attractive, now that he had kissed one and it was kind of nice, he thought he must be bi. But then after a second date and a less enthralling kiss, Blaine abruptly decides nope, he's 100% gay.

So much for exploring those feelings.

Now, I don’t want to go off on a tangent about Blaine’s characterization or Glee’s, well, let's just say inconsistent writing for all of the characters, so I will focus entirely on this single plot point.

Ask most any gay man when they knew it was boys that they liked, and they'll say that it was from a pretty young age. While I didn’t have a name for it, I was very much aware that I was attracted to both boys and girls even prior to knowing what sex was. I wasn’t confused, I didn’t question it, nor did I have much angst about it. I just knew what I was and that there were two aspects to my sexuality — one that the world accepted and one it did not.

So Glee's flippant portrayal of bisexuality really irked me. Bisexuality is such a contentious issue that it should not be fumbled this way. For a character to say “maybe I’m bi” in one scene and then the next say, “nope, definitely gay” is almost cruel in how dismissive it is toward bisexuals by trivializing the intense confusion that many bisexual people feel in coming to terms with their orientation.

If a show is going to open this particular box, it needs to go through everything inside — even the stuff with sharp edges. Why would Blaine suddenly think he was attracted to girls after one kiss? Had he ever wondered before? Had he ever tried dating a girl? Were these doubts something that had always existed in the back of his head?

There was a whole conversation to be had here. While Blaine would not have been my choice for the character to have that conversation, I work with what I have. If Glee's creator Ryan Murphy wanted to bring my peeps into the discussion, then Blaine and Kurt needed to sit down and actually debate bisexuality and what their feelings were.

Instead, the sentiment flippantly expressed by Kurt in "Blame it on the Alcohol" — that bisexuals are just gays who are trying to fake being normal — was the only message viewers could take away from the episode as it was the only point of view presented. And that’s a terrible message to send, akin to saying "all gay men hate women" or something equally hateful. I don’t think it’s unreasonable to expect better — especially from a show created by someone from the GLBT community.

Which bring us to “Sexy,” last week's episode featuring the wonderful Brittany (Heather Morris) and Santana (Naya Rivera). This time around Murphy was able to bring all of the needed pathos, confusion and heartache to the issue — and still mess it up. Because in spite of the wonderful acting and brilliant writing, the one thing they didn’t do was bring up the “B” word.

During the episode, Santana and Brittany finally discussed their feelings for each other. Santana insisted she would not be labeled while Brittany, bless her heart, wouldn’t really even know what a label was if not stuck on a jar. So once again, it seemed my peeps were being shut out and for whatever reason, no one wanted to say that they’re bi.

Do we have cooties?

Here’s what I see in Brittany and Santana. Santana uses guys but has never shown any feelings for them other than contempt. Yes, she's clearly had sex with guys, but there’s never really been any clear indication if she is physically or emotionally attracted to them in any way. And yes, she has said she was, but we haven't really seen it — a sharp contrast to the obvious love and tenderness she shows for Brittany.

Santana might not like labels and would probably cut me for saying it, but I'm comfortable with saying Santana is a lesbian.

Brittany, however, is bisexual in my opinion. Love it or hate it, her relationship with Artie is real and every indication is that she has romantic feelings for him, cares about him, and near as we can tell, is happily intimate with him in some fashion.

But she clearly has deep feelings for Santana as well. In a way, it sort of breaks my heart to see such a simple, innocent soul like Brittany have to contend with figuring out what it means to be bisexual. It’s good, though, that even if the show won’t put the Scarlet B on her (h/t to Jamie), at least in her scenes we see an honest depiction of a bisexual person. Even better, it’s a sign of the times that a girl can be torn between her feelings for a boy and her feelings for a girl, and have none of the conflict revolve around her confusion about her orientation.

Unfortunately, because the show thus far won’t actually have any characters talk about bisexuality and the fact that some people really do like both genders, it leaves it up to the audience to decide what Brittany’s feelings mean.

As a bisexual person this troubles me because I am keenly aware of how easy it is for some on the religious right to point to any depiction of a character who likes both genders and insist it is evidence that being gay is a choice. And for those gays and lesbians who feel bisexuality is a myth, it’s easy to dismiss Brittany’s feelings for Artie as just the confused emotions of a teenage girl.

Why does this matter? Why can't I, as a bisexual, simply be delighted that GLBT folks get screen time of any sort? We're all part of that little alphabet soup together, right?

It's for the same reason that gay men were so frustrated when there were so few gay characters on television — representation matters and exclusion hurts. Much of the reason gays and lesbians have made so many strides in acceptance is due to their visibility in popular culture via shows like Glee.

But for bisexual people — especially bisexual men — there is very little in popular culture to validate their life experience. Thankfully, more bisexual men like Mike Manning from The Real World and Ryan Buell of Paranormal State are coming out, but for a boy or a girl who is grappling with the reality that they are attracted to both genders, the world can still be a pretty unfriendly place. By refusing to admit there is a place between gay and straight, the media forces these kids to “choose” between the two sides of themselves.

Glee is about empowerment of outsiders — Kurt, a gay, out and proud teen, Lauren, the plus-sized girl who knows how beautiful she is, Rachel the social misfit who knows she has a star inside her. The show encourages people to embrace and celebrate their differences, and there is no better message in this day and age of bullying and suicides.

Is it so much to ask, then, that my peeps be more than just a punchline?

source: afterelton.com